PLEASE WATCH THE WHOLE THING
if you keep reblogging celebs dumping water all over themselves, even if you’re not, please watch this. please please please watch this.
I have to find a new counselor because the one I had suddenly stopped seeing me.
I’m really pissed.
Like, really. Fucking. Pissed.
Careful, honey, it’s loaded,” he said, reentering the bedroom.
Her back rested against the headboard. “This for your wife?”
“No. Too chancy. I’m hiring a professional.”
“How about me?”
He smirked. “Cute. But who’d be dumb enough to hire a lady hit man?”
She wet her lips, sighting along the barrel.
"Bedtime Story", Jeffrey Whitmore (via arbryna)
Oh shit. Plot twist.
- be thin
- give birth
- cook for you
- have long hair
- wear makeup
- have sex with you
- be feminine
- be graceful
- be fashionable
- wear pink
- love men
- be the media’s idea of perfection
- listen to your bullshit